Dilligaf

My trip to Mae Sai was primarily to do a visa run, i.e., nip across the Myanmar border into Tachilek, then return to Thailand for a new two-week visa. Because those annoying folks in Myanmar won't allow the temporary import of vehicles, I will have to fly the bike from Bangkok to Kathmandu later in the month. But I was curious to see what Myanmar was like. It had a distinct Indian flavour to it - a lot of curry stands, and plenty of red spit flying around. I know that border towns are seldom the most appealing places, but after less than an hour I was in the queue to return back to Thailand... enough said I think.

Crossing the bridge into Myanmar

From Mae Sai I took the 1290 to the Golden Triangle where Thailand, Myanmar and Laos meet at the confluence of the Mekong and Ruak rivers. The road is relatively flat and boring, and there's not much to do there, other than go to the Opium Museum, where I learned that the best position to smoke opium is called 'heels in buttocks'. I thought it might be like a brewery tour, but free samples at the end were not forthcoming. It was interesting to see the Mekong, although I think I will be seeing plenty more of it in Laos.

Don't worry mum - I'm wearing a money belt under my shirt...

At the end of the day, I headed to Chiang Rai along the 4004 and the 1209, which run along a flood plain, so not much sport there. I stayed at the excellent Kung Thong hotel on Sanambin (well, clean sheets, hot water and friendly staff is excellent in my book for 270 Baht).

The next day, I headed back to the west. After such great riding around Doi Ang Thang and Mae Salong, I was wondering if it was worthwhile to go back and do the 'Mae Hong Son loop', but it turned out to be one of the highlights of North Thailand. From Chiang Rai, the 118 to Wiang Pa Pao isn't too exciting, but the 1150 to the 107 is an absolute blinder - with lots of elevation changes and tight corners, it's a great road for sportsbikes. Just outside Phrao, I had a quick reality check - bits of moped and vegetables scattered across the road eventually led to the aftermath of a head-on crash between a step-thru and a pick-up. Not a pretty sight. Rather than pick my way through the crowd and the paramedics, I decided that a U-turn was the best course of action and stopped in Phrao for some lunch.

After some great mountain roads, I decided to finish the day with a bit of dirt. There's a 50km 'forestry trail' on the map from Kong Lom to Pai that's accessible from the 1322. The 1322 is a brilliant ride - more twisty mountain roads - but it dead-ends at the Myanmar border. At the checkpoint in Kong Lom, they reckoned it was a 4 hour ride to Pai, but it was already 3:30pm and it gets dark here at around 6:30, so I knew I had to push on. The first part really got the adrenaline going - incredibly steep climbs and descents, thick with bull dust, with hairpin corners and steep drop-offs. Past Muang Noi, it was a bit flatter so I could make much better progress, and I rolled into Pai at about 6pm.

Track into Pai from the north

I think I'll take my chances with the ford

As soon as I entered Pai, I could tell it was a bit different. Sure, it's predominantly another tourist town for people who want to trek in the nearby mountains, but it has a very distinct vibe. It's clean. It's genuinely 'arty' - real creative stuff, rather than the generic 'face of buddha' art you usually see in Thailand. They even close the road to cars for the night market. In a word, it's 'boutique'. In fact, it's so unique that the locals call it Pailand. Having bagged the San Franciscans for their Tolstoy-reading in Mae Salong, I have to give one back to the English - there are a lot of public schoolboys cruising around Pai on mopeds discussing their hangovers and which waterfall to visit today. But it's a cool place nevertheless.

The highlight for me in Pai was Dilligaf, a biker bar on Thanon Rungsiyanon run by Jan and his wife Gaew. Jan expained that Dilligaf stands for 'Do I Look Like I Give A Fuck', which after working in Holland for many years is his guiding principle. Since one of the motivations for this trip is to get a bit more Dilligaf in my life, I thought it made a good motto for the trip. Plus I liked the sticker, which now sits proudly on the screen under the Union Jack.

After a few Changs at Dilligaf, we finished the evening at the Bamboo Bar, where we sat on a bamboo terrace around a clay firepit - it can get a bit chilly up in the mountains. Unfortunately, the next day began with a bit of a hangover - four large (i.e., 660ml) Changs in one evening is a bit much, especially at 6.4%. However, after a hot day in the saddle, the first couple do tend to disappear fairly quickly, and they're only about one pound fifty. Hmm - one night in Pai and now I'm discussing my hangovers...

Accommodation at Charlie's Guest House was very good. The next day, I hit the legendary 1095 - much loved by bikers, and much feared by those travelling by bus. In fact, they say that some tour companies give certificates to people who finish the journey without puking. I rode the 100 or so kilometres to Mae Hong Son, and I must say that it's one of the very, very best roads I've ever seen - smooth as a ribbon and winding its way up to about 1,500 metres. Some of the corners are so long that you can forget which way is up... On a sportsbike it would be sublime, but other than a couple of old CB750s, I didn't see a single big bike.

No pukers please

At Mae Hong Son, I took a detour to see a Paduang village up in the mountains at Huai Sua Tao. They're famous for having long necks - which they do...

Longneck woman

Instead of doing the whole Mae Hong Son loop, which is about 520km, I turned off the 108 at Khun Yuam and took the 1263 to Mae Chaem, another pearler of a ride. It's a bit rougher and tighter, but that suits me fine on a dual sport. Mae Chaem was fairly unremarkable as a stop-over, but served as a good base for a trip up Doi Inthanon, the highest mountain in Thailand, which conveniently has a road leading right to the top. Once again, the 1192 and 1009 on either side of Doi Ithanon are stunning roads.

Doi Inthanon

By this stage, I was incredibly glad to have cut back from the Golden Triangle to ride a part of the Mae Hong Son loop. The roads to the north east and north west of Chiang Mai are a biker's dream, and to make the most of the area, you need to experience both. Jan had invited me back to Pai to ride with him and his mates, and I would have quite happily spent another couple of weeks exploring the area, but I'm conscious that the days are ticking by, so I decided to head back to Chiang Mai. Additionally, I've given the bike a lot of abuse over the past week, and I need to be mindful that there's a lot of ground yet to cover on this trip, and some of it will not be as amenable as Thailand.

I was planning to spend one night in Chiang Mai to collect my panniers, which I had left at the hotel, and prepare for the two day ride to Laos. Unfortunately I had my first 'Heston Blumenthal' moment of the trip that evening, and it really came on strong. Just as I thought things couldn't get worse, the lights went out - not a pleasant experience given the utter devastation I'd just wreaked on the bathroom - and I could hear a lot of sirens outside. It did briefly crossed my mind that the hotel might be burning down, and then the lights came back on and I was able to clean things up. But when I opened the curtains and looked out of the window, there was an almighty fire down the street. Tomorrow will be a recovery day, I think...